The one with the Ramblings

Sad Early this morning, I came to work as usual, feeling indifferent. Not too lazy or reluctant and at the same time not too enthusiastic. Just normal. I thought it would be another normal routine day for me. Maybe I was wrong. As I walk by ER this morning, I saw a relative to one of my patient waiting outside ER. I do expected him to come today for review. I approached him and asked " so, how is he?", he replied with worry look on his face " not good" My heart pounded fast. A little bit of introduction of who is Mr K. He is a 60year old Chinese gentleman, who was a schizophrenic patient, admitted to my ward for almost 3weeks for a medical problem in which we are still investigating. He was so cute, he didn't have aggressive behaviour like most schizophrenic patient have. He is stable. His condition was actually improving after 1 week and we made a lot of appointments for him, scans and etc to investigate his illness. However, the reason why we have to prolong

Like every year, we hope that there will be changes in our life, for better of course. Another year has past, full with happiness, sadness, tough times, joyous times, hardship, losses and new comers in every aspect of our life with family, friends, colleagues, superiors, or anyone along the way. When you analyzed the things you have done and have been through all year, how do you feel? Feel contented? Achieved? Regret? Still not good enough? As for myself, I feel bless for whatever had happened throughout this year, in spite the bitterness. And I feel thankful to those who had come alongside me through every thick and thin, from the apex of my heart, I give you my greatest appreciation. And now the resolutions 1) To travel more - Japan is the starting point and more to come. I always get the remarks that i like to have a grand plan about something like travel around the world and backpacking all year so let me prove them. Make it an annual thing and it actually can be the booster to m

Has been "lost" AGAIN for the past few days. Lost : Don't know what to do in life, lost passion in work, questioning needs and desires, unmotivated, feel like hanging, lost of characters. Was it probably due to long holidays; felt nice, full of love and comfy at home after a dreadful, depressed gloomy life and series of unfortunate events at Kapit? I need that passion again. When I decided to be a doctor When I decided for myself to serve the people in Borneo and those at the interiors When I decided to fall in love with surgery The feelings, the adrenaline rush, the energy, the love, the smiles, the appreciation, the stupid satisfaction. I want to have all those back. I want to stop ramblings about things in my life. Lets find something to share. I want my Raison I want to stay positive. Lets do this!!!!!!!

malam ini.... dah lama tak berjalan sorang-sorang pada waktu malam...merayau... Takut?...ade gak la... tapi kalau ikut mood...perangai macam ni akan muncul waktu mood "lost" ataupun "blues" ku drive keliling bandar aimlessly...sambil ku perhatikan drivers di kiri dan kanan ku... apakah reaksi mereka bila ku tenung tanpa berkelip?..apakah yang tengah mereka lakukan di dalam kereta?...korek idung?...bernyanyi??...apakah reaksi jika ku lambai ke arah mereka?? seronok kah aku??...TERAMAT...ku suke melihat ekspressi dan riak wajah mereka secara candid!!! seterusnya ku ke tempat membeli belah....juga suka melihat reaksi manusia...yang bercouple, yang berkeluarga, kanak-kanak berlari...ku ke kedai kesukaan ku...TOY STORE!!!!...seronok melihat pelbagai permainan di sana..boleh tak beli kesemuanya? (kecuali anak patung berupa budak kecil yang amat horror seolah chucky itu)...ku mahu transformers, ku mahu Nerf, ku mahu kesemua figura, ku mahu soft toys juga anak patung yang m

Day 1 of work after 1 week holiday.... Perasaan???? Malas Tak semangat nak tengok patient Rindu Kosong Mode aku tak kesah..aku nak lari.. Nak tegur strangers

What is it feel like to turn 26? hmmm hhmmmmmmmmmm errrrrrr aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa ooooooooo nothing...just like every other day...EXCEPT... i woke up in the morning and the first person i saw and kissed was Azman I have my family with me I am home another 4 years...i'll be 30 and another 10 years, InsyaAllah, I'll be 40.. What's up with this number?? People say age is just a number.... But it is not entirely true.... It is a mark... How well have you done till now? How much have you learn? How many things have you seen? How many people have you treasured? How many foe have you made? Have i accomplished most of the things i always wanted? Will I make all of them real? let's ask again when i turn 30. Hopefully i will not be as dramatic as Joey when he turned 30.

The same remarks from any hairdresser that i will normally receive. " you have A LOT of hair" "your hair is dry" " your face is round and chubby, too short is not suitable for you" The things that they will suggest in order to make my hair look "thinner" or "lesser" will be either straighten it or snip them a bit using that special cutter which turns out to be bad for my hair. So, i go for rebonding. The process takes so effing long that make me regret sometimes. Luckily my hair is not that long so comparatively it should be faster. (sorry Aman you have to wait soooo long for me. genetically I am a girl and I sometime need to do this girl stuff..sorry) But the best part if you go to salon is the massage. I have to admit sincerely and personally i fell the "bapuks" or the aquas are the best masseurs. the way how these gifted people caress your hair, stroke my hair with their soft but strong fingers, it feels like the whole wei

ok...lets talk about it..since a lot of people keep on asking about this recently. The problem is I am scared of commitment. The idea of being together for the rest of your life, to accept each other greatness and weakness, to be there during the ups and downs, to share the same place where your privacy and space will be invaded by someone you just recently know, and to cook for him and to do that every day, for the rest of your life?..Not acceptable for now. I can imagine myself having kids, a pair of cute toddlers running around and hug me lovingly. But i still can't imagine myself with the opposite sex. Call me lunatic? whatever you want it to be. I don't really care. It seems that the idea of raising a child is much simpler than having a life partner. Don't ask me because even I don't know why. Why a? Don't get me wrong, I am not a feminist like I used to be. I am now more open. It just that I treasure friendship more than a lover. I mean I don't see any va

A quick review....A for Awesomeness, Amazing, Avada kedavra fantastic!! For those who have read the book, this will be the best Potter movie so far. Why? Unlike previous Potter's films, they are too summarized hence you will feel disappointed for them missing the details and moments. For this latest installment, they try to give you exactly what you have read. Exactly. Like previous movies, this also help to "confirm" the things you imagine when you read the book. It makes you say "owh, that is how Luna's house looks like. Owh, how handsome Bill Weasley is." Etc Etc. But for those who have not read the book, it probably going to be boring. The storyline is a bit slow here. Overall, it was a great movie and to see them grow in this movie is absolutely spectacular. My advise will be, stop whatever you are doing now. Stop reading this blog and make yourself to the nearest cinema and watch this movie. Must watched movie before you die!!! Can't wait for the s

I am following Amazing Race Asia season 4. Obviously rooting for Ethan and Khairie from Malaysia. How I wish they should have won the race but definitely they have captured my heart. KYAAA!! I never watch Amazing Race Asia. Never since the first season which I know has been won by team from Malaysia. (I only know that from my quick research). But what have made me to watch this season of Amazing Race is because of the diversity of characters of the players. Meet Ethan and Khairie. First impression when I saw them on TV. "Are they for real?" They are just about the opposite yet work really well together!! Friends met at college, join Amazing Race as Khairie was having a "middle of quarter life crisis" drag Ethan with him into this race. Both are humble, not a celebrity like other contestants, and they played really well. They are fun to watch, always happy and never I heard them quarrel or fight about all the tasks they have to do. Always optimistic in everything the

I found myself spent most of my time playing Phrases and answering Quizzes in Facebook. Yup, they were fun. To get to know your personality, what career suits you, how are you going to die and who kill you? I mean, don't you feel curious to know all those. Who are you marrying with? How many children will you have? Stuff like that. And I also noticed that most of my friends (most of them are doctors anyway) have tried the quiz especially "which profession suits you and what kind of doctor should you be". Is it really for fun? or they are searching for a definite answer? Was it just me or I smell regrets somewhere. Also I found out from my boss saying that now FB is not allow or band in hospital. Someone made a survey and found out that KKM staffs are the highest users for FB and they usually use them during office hours. Makes me wonder? Why? Depression? Loneliness? Stress? Whatever it is, i definitely find it interesting playing this stuff. Honestly I do read horoscope e

I had one of the weirdest dream last night. I was at a beach walking along the waterline, and I saw him. His back. He was too walking along with his Tshirt and 3quarter pants. I could tell that I was really happy to see him even only his back. My heart pounded really fast. I made my walk a little faster so that I could catch up on him. He noticed and turned around and suddenly he was on a wheelchair look really sick. Like really cachexic and pale. I stopped. Horrified. Not only to see him like that but the scary thing was then I noticed that both my legs were amputated up to the knee level. When I turned back to him, he was gone. I saw a miniture size of him who is running away in front of me. Weird. But these are few of my dreams that scares hell out of me. I woke up this morning quickly feel my limbs. Thank God they still intact. Same goes with another dream that I had long time ago. I had been chased by a group of ghouls and I ran as hard as I can to get away from them. When I woke

I can never tell what politicians think. I wish i have the power to read other people's mind. Kapit. More or less 4months I have been living as a not so loving Medical Officer here in Kapit. Time flies really fast. A chronicles of bad events that happened to me lately make me realize, world is NOT FAIR. So Unjust! The heavy logs incident that filled up Rajang River. The express boat accident. The low level of water of Rajang River. Don't you get it? Are you blind? Or pretend to be blind? Are these still not enough to open your mind and eyes that Kapit does need help here!!!. We call ourselves a developing country. Is it? Yes developing only in some part of the country but most of the place still live in poverty. The only way to go to Kapit is by the express boat. Yes by the river. There is NO road access to Kapit. NO at all. The express' tickets are not cheap. And it can only operate at daytime up till 3pm. They can't go at night as they can't see the stream well. A

Is not the cat that I want to share...It is about Mama and how cute is she..Haha..I laugh really hard whenever i watch this video...

Pabila hati berkata dan mengendahkan kata otaknya. Jam menunjukkan pukul 4.25pm, ada 35minit lagi untuk aku habis pulang. Buat-buat busy di depan komputer, kononnya menaip clinical summary untuk pesakit tetapi nampaknya tak terdaya nak teruskan. Sebaliknya, terasa nak menulis sesuatu kat dalam blog ini. Nak tulis. Nak taip. Nak kongsi. APA? Jom tanya hati. Kata hati, nak ke Rembau sekarang, nak peluk ibu, babah, aman, ami, mama, ajat dan kucing2 kesayangan. Hati terasa rindu dengan mereka. Biarpun setiap kali perbualan kami akan menyentuh sedikit sebanyak masalah kewangan, masalah sekolah, masalah masa depan, masalah itu masalah ini. Apakah hidup tanpa masalah. Tapi rasa tenang bila di rumah, bila bersama mereka. Mungkin betul rumah itu syurga. Eh, bukan. Keluarga itu syurga. Hati rasa tidak mahu bekerja lagi. Penat. Bukan penat fizikal tapi mental dan emosi. Selalu tertanya, kenapa la dipilih profession ini. Jika ku teruskan course ku di UTP dulu, mungkin aku berada di pejabat. Mungki

sigh i am wondering... am i safe?.....safe to practice?... i wish i can point my fingers to others too... but knowing them...they have their own points to say no it is not their fault.... but think again...it is mine... maybe i am too daring and too fast... my skill is still not good.... now.... i begin not to trust others... always believe in your own site of story.... man...i have to retake the whole history again then... sigh... am i safe??... please no more morbidity or mortality for the next few weeks...

My mind couldn't stop thinking about that case. The mortality What did i do? Where was the mistake? What if? Should I do that? What else I could offer? The non stop questions and the horrible feeling. Damn. I went shopping and I walked around that small supermarket and I didn't know what i bought. I just grabbed anything i saw I might need or I might like and threw them into the basket. It was a guilty and hopeless feeling. I repeatedly say it to myself, "Damn, I'm sorry kid. Please forgive me. That's the best I could do". While I was on that mode, suddenly I heard this song airing in the supermarket. "Its too late to apologize. Too late" Apologize from One Republic. I smirked. Really? Then I worried. Really?? Heh. There. I'm going to hell anyway. Then on my way back, in my car. Still feeling depress about what had happened. Even more after listening to that song, suddenly I heard this; "you are an amazing woman" I don't know the ti

Sigh Last night. I watched FRIENDS. Yes the sitcom. There are only few reasons why i watch the sitcom. Whenever i feel bored. Or if i want to revise (yes about the details in that sitcom) Or I have a really really bad day and i need something that can make me happy. So yesterday, I was not bored. How can i be bored since i was tooooo busy in the hospital. I don't need to revise since i was not doing the FRIENDS quiz for quite some time now. Then it was for the reason number 3. It was soooo bad that involved PAEDIATRIC MORTALITY. hmmm....i guess that summarized everything isn't it. Its another 1 month from now for the mortality review. I'll be doomed. As usual, i may look cool about it. But i am depress. Especially it involves a couple who have no child and that was their only adopted child. I could still remember the loud tears of the mother. She must be very devastating. It was very unlucky for that child that day. For any ill patient who came to Hospital that day i would

random pic..this is not errica.. Past 2 days, i had a surprise encounter with someone i know and miss so much...E rica Rendey Remember her? Yes, she was a young Ibanese girl who was admitted to Kuching last time for neutropenic sepsis. A very clever girl who amazed me with her imitation of me taking her blood. Yup!! what a small world after all!!... She is here in Kapit!!!... She came with cough and flu. Not ill enough for admission. She now has hair!!!..but still the same Errica Rendey who doesn't like to be touch. Oh how I miss her big eyes. But that they, she did not put on any make up like she used too. I flipped through her cancer book. Its a book that every cancer patient has that show their progression. What have been done and will be done. Then, I was speechless. Despite her look that day, healthy look, sweet and cute, the truth is she has been suffering a lot. The condition was not that good. She has relapses. Involving the brain and the blood. Still requiring chemo. And s

Just open a new blog specially for Japan trip...Am i too excited??....hell yeah I am.. Check it out will ya..http://ikutsukela.blogspot.com/

Dumbfounded when a patient told me " I do have chest pain after been scolded by you". Cynical huh. Annoying to me. I may have tell you this thousands and millions time and it becomes boring. There goes Wani again rambling about the same thing. But the reality is, the same thing happen here in my life. Like a repeated Deja Vu but with different person. I do have good insight about it that my job is killing my soul slowly. Wondering what was my replied? "Good, because I have it all the time whenever i meet person like you" Irritable, grumpy, frustating, or in simpler universal word; bitchy. I hate the sound of the clinic's door whenever a patient enters I felt despise. I hate the word "subak" or in other world "long time ago" because i can't define how long you have been having it. I hate the word "mimit" or " a little bit" because i can't define the severity of your illness I hate the word "semua pedis" or

Sigh.... Sometimes, if you plan a lot in your life, to the point you are afraid of not able to commit all of them, it will make you feel depress. Not planning at all in your life, could be adventurous but yet risky and make you feel anxious. For instance, planning to get serious in your career by taking master program. Good. The question is when? which one? and suddenly you back out and said "maybe i am not ready" Planning to go holidays, around the world. Fantasy but do able. But the problem is when? where? "maybe i save my money for my family" Not planning to settle down. Put my trust on faith and miracle 100%. It is adventurous and fun but until when? Not planning your finance for you future. I feel so stupid. but again, it made me think. What exactly i save my money for in the future? I need money now!! To plan a plan is sick. I hate plan. But not planning make me insecure. That's why i day dream. Where everything is possible. Sigh. If I plan to day dream? I

Raya!!!!!!!!!! Seperti raya sebelum ni, duit dalam akaun aku akan turun mendadak. Disebabkan these evil minions. Few things too highlight about this raya. Actually lots of things. 1) cuti seminggu mmg tak berbaloi. one whole day dah habis utk travel SAHAJA. 3hours dlm boat. 45minutes dalam taxi and 2hours 15min dlm plane. pastu 1hour dlm kete. sampai2 dah penat. hai. lain kali balik kene mintak lebih sket. tapi still bersyukur. tak seperti mereka yang lain yang kerje di waktu raya terutamanya yg kat semenanjung. huhu. sape suh tak keje kat sabah sarawak. 2) Beraya di rumah baru!!!...a bit weird in the beginning. sebab dah 25 tahun kat rumah lama, bile dah buat rumah baru, rasa lain sket. not feeling homie YET. Suke rumah baru. tapi merindui rumah lama. I miss the squeaking sounds of the floor once you step on it. the smell of the wooden walls. every little memories in it. 3) Mama has improved a lot...she can walk now with few steps and her words make more sense...congratz mama..keep i

I don't blame you 100%, even though you are one of the factor. Most of it is because of ME. I remember how enthusiastic I was when I first started being a medical officer. New place, new life, new people. The road that I have chosen maybe bumpy sometime but what is life without an adventure. So motivated. So thrill. Then I do remember that I told my friend once to ask me again in next 2months. If she asks me now, I mean, like really at this moment, the answer will be a straight NO. Seriously, my works right now demotivate me every single day. Day by day, I realized that I becoming more grumpy, denial and hopeless. How I wish that all the disease can come or presented exactly like in the books. Like how we have been taught. And how I wish taking history will be as simple as medical school as the patient will leads us the way to the diagnosis. Why real patients are so not like my stimulated patients in medical school? Taking history is really a pain in the arse. Especially from a sup

I have been watching quite a number of movies lately. Most of them are the contribution from the previous MO who was kind enough to leave a box of pirated movies in the MO's room. Thanks a lot. 1) All About Steve Honestly, the reason why i wanted to watch this movie in the first place was because of Sandra Bullock............ Ok I lied. Haha. It was because of Bradley Cooper. Ooooo...That's more like me isn't it? Talking about bitch and desperado? That kinda my thing nowadays. Sigh. But the movie was entertaining. I never knew that there is such thing as crossword constructor???..It is an actual job!!! Must have missed that out during carreer week. Ok. It was about this girl, a crossword constructor (Sandra Bullock), who has been labeled as "abnormal". Defined as too dedicated to her work, making crosswords everyday, eventhough she loves it but people thinks that she is weird, doesn't have life and rarely or almost never socialize with people (is that weird?).

After watching movies like "one week" and "All About Steve", i feel like one to go for backpacking. Like now. This instants. But...sigh.... Only that i have this so called obligations here and the fact that i am not a rich brat, i have to withhold the idea of having a blast holiday/adventure. Where i want to go? Here are some of the places i want to go. (wish i can go everyplace in this world. possible) 1) India - see the colorful culture that they have, the people and spectacular buildings 2) Japan - THE PEOPLE, the technology, 3) Australia - western to be exact 4) Europe - the scenery, people, 5) Morocco - scenery 6) Vietnam - just feel like want to go there 7) Brazil - world cup 2014 - a long waiting plan. 8) Canada - i want to sit on the biggest chair!!! Sigh..again.. What if i become selfish? How about, i just go to these places, apply leaves for 1 whole month and just go backpacking. Don't really care what gonna happen to hospital anyway. Is it possible?

this is a post from my crazee brother's blog...he is sooooo into rubiks...he is a freak!!!! but amazing...can you guess what kind of animal he tried to make?? azmi Rubik's Collection: TWISTED ANIMAL

Have you ever have this feeling. Whenever you listen to a song, no matter the song you like or the song you know, it somehow bring back to the memories you had about that song. For example, whenever i listen to Eminem, i will remember a friend of mine. We both like Em sooo much that we took the effort to memorize the lyric. And i still remember she told me the story on how she suddenly decided to like Em. " i woke up this morning and my heart tells me that i like Eminem" haha. How i miss to hang out with her again. There are few songs that old and new which whenever i listen to them, it brings out that feeling and memory back. Or there are songs was like a theme song for a reason. Here are few songs that i could think of right now. There are lots more than these. 1) Nelly(Hot in Ere) - i remember that i used to listen to this song a lot during my time at Kolej Mara Banting. Especially while waiting for Kak Ella or kak Erra shouted "nasi lemak, nasi goreng". And i co

Presenting to you, their first appearance in public, for their first debut album, The Red Umbrella Band Band members : Noni as the lead singer, Saber Blade as the main guitarist, and Rubiks Manic as the percussionist. They will release their first singles, Red Umbrella anthem and Rain Rain Go Away, starting from today. Have fun.

my on call sucks It was OK in the beginning. I helped my friend to cover his ward this weekend. Besides I am on call hence I don't mind at all. My on call started with signing a death certificate for a patient who has been sick for a while and planned not for an active resuscitation. I got the feeling that it was not a good sign but I just ignore it. "Superstition la", I told myself. Around 5.30pm, I was just arrived at ER as they called me to review some of the patients there. Suddenly, they pushed 3 patients into the ER. The first one was a referral back from Sibu, patient was fine. Plan for admission. Not a problem at all. The second patient looked like a case of stroke. So, it wasn't a problem either. Stabilize him first overnight and can send to Sibu CM for CT brain. The third patient gave me a shock of a life!!! A young Indonesian man, alleged a timber camp accident, sustained injury at his right leg. It occurred at 9am and came to me at 530PM!!!!!..I got a bad

Is there any possibility that i have the touch of death? This weekend will be the 2nd time i cover medical ward. Last week, there was this uncle who has been sick for few weeks. I reviewed him. Initially, he was still can be consider OK despite his weak looking, and a bit fast breathing. Later on that day, he became weaker, and not responded to call. His blood pressure was gradually came down. But that case already noted to the family members. They have been informed that the uncle was not well and the condition is deteriorating very fast. Even CPR may not help to revive him. Hence, decision for not resuscitate (DNR) in the event of cardiac arrest has been agreed by all the family members. That evening, the patient died. Today, another similar scenario with different patient. He has been there for quite sometime. However, he decided to gasp his last breath today. I was able to say hi to him this morning. Despite his weak appearance, he was still able to answer my question. Few hours af

My God!!!...I lost track. When was the last time I went out and click for some pictures? A month ago? Damn that was long!! I rarely got time to go out and photographing, got little time to edit them too. I miss that feeling. I should start outing again and took some good photos. Yup, I should. Here are some of the old pics that i managed to edit. Recently, my friends went to Bako National Park at Kuching. Damn i missed that place. I wish i could come back there to try different trail. Planning to go to Mulu somewhere this year, but definitely not now. Financial constraint. Sigh. This will be the moment when you will ask yourself, "why am I not a rich brat??" happy fasting everyone

selamat berpuasa semua. moga2 ramadhan ni lebih bermakna. amin kurangkan mengumpat (termasuk kurangkan tgk melodi) kurangkan marah patient (saya akan cuba yang terbaik!!!) kurangkan bermalasan (tidak jugalah terlalu rajin...kesian nanti penat) kurangkan kelaraan (err..kurangkan FB?) kurangkan berat badan (itu sudah mesti....pinggang 11inch nih..haha..angan) tambah amal (buat kebaikan, tlg isi borang OKU??..) tambah zikir (berzikir nama Allah, bukan nama org lain mahupun lyric lagu eminem..haha ) tambah ibadat (tarawih kalau dpt..mintak2 penuh) tambah sedekah (tapi tak la sampai tak claim oncall. sedekah tu sedekah jgk..jgn sampai muflis) tambah pahala (insyaAllah..jika dilakukan dgn ikhlas) mari kita mensucikan diri amin

i watched UP the animation movie last night It was a sweet movie. The whole idea was fantastic. 1) I wish i can have my great adventure. Either the real adventure with hot air ballon, mythical creatures, and find great waterfalls or the adventure in my life with people that i love. 2) The togetherness between Ellie and Carl is so romantic and so sweet. Wondering whether i can find one or stick to one. Sigh 3) The idea of having millions of balloons attached to your chimney and flew around was awesome!!...looks ridiculous but awesome!! 4) i don't want my child to have lack of loves from his family like Russel. but i want him to be as cute like Russel!!!.. 5) Anything is possible. Just believe in that. 6) Happiness is define by doing things you like with people you love, and making others happy 7) I want a cute and cool house like Carl and Ellie's 8) Never too late to do whatever you want to do. There is always time for you to do that. Just watch it please. You will understand wh

i felt emotionally and physically unstable these past few days not much about work more about my feelings and personality interpersonal conflict usually this conflict will occur once in a while i don't know what i really want and what others want wouldn't it be easier if matters can be solved by saying it out loud and to confess truthfully rather making it a riddle to solve but its not going to help much if you don't even know what to say and to whom should you confess to i wish i can read others people's mind what they really think tell you the truth, i am lousy at picking up signs hence you body language or your flowerish words of wisdom are useless tell me straight to the point life or life why it has to be so complicated? or am i just exaggerating and making it complicated?

Taking care of OPD can be mentally and emotionally challenging sometimes. Especially if you are drained out from your sleepless eventful on call and have to continue working the next day to get scrutinize by 100 strangers. How would you feel if:- 1) A patient came to you with sky high blood pressure and sky high blood sugar and to know that he or she didn't take the medications at all because he or she thought that "i feel very well now". it still fine if you miss 1-2 days, especially if you ran out of stock (still not acceptable because you should come to collect you medications BEFORE it finishes), but it was so irritating if the patient did not take them for a year!!! i wonder how he could survive without having stroke or heart attack. God is so merciful. 2) A patient came to you complaining all sort of pain or illnesses that are not even related. "Dr, i have a stomachache" "Dr i also have headache" "Dr my ear also in pain" "Dr i have

listen carefully to him..."he said the dragon was heartless but why he stabbed in the heart?"...then who killed the dragon then?...could it be that the dragon died due to excessive laugh by watching their stupidity?...or could it be the unicorn?

Will you change about yourself or will you change your principal? For someone else? In what extend will you ever think of doing that? Should I? For example, I like to remain unknown, remain anonymous. So that i can walk freely and do whatever i want without worry. If i act stupid, people will only say, "Yeah, like that one girl try to jump from that tree but managed to land on that pile of boxes" Instead of, "Yeah, like Dr Wani last time......." But, when public somehow notice you, it was uneasy. When people say hi to you from all direction, and the worse part is when you couldn't recognize or remember who they are? And they know you as the doctor. My principal was " once you get known by the people at your workplace or the town you stay, its time to move out" Looks like it is not applicable in Kapit. I think i have met half the Kapitan here only in 3 weeks of working. I don't want to move out just yet. I haven't explore Kapit that well. But de

i experienced my first medivac ride yesterday. Thank God i made it. At first the feeling was...mixed. Excited, happy, nauseated, worried and then blank. I sent a text message to my close friends, and to know how they feel for me who is about to embark into a awesome scary journey. "Just to let you know that i love you so much and forgive me for all the stupid cute things that i have done. I'm saying this now because less than 1hr i;ll be in the medivac escorting a patient to Sibu!!! First time dude. So keep your eyes on d news. Love u all. Haha" That was exactly how i told them. Interesting. Here are their replies 1) "Jgn lupa amk gamba, ok =)" 2) " Jaga2 check helicopter tu.....cari lambang decepticon" 3) " Kau jgn mcm2, skali btol2.abis ko" Reading all these, making me love them more. Haha, they know me better than i do. The first one had faith in me and knew that i going to enjoy the ride The second one was a bit retarded but since the per